Hi, I am Phone

1 Apr

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Nice to meet you!

Today I decided that I would share with the world my importance.

If you must know, this is most definitely not in response to the fact that my owner left me abandoned all alone, in the cold, on the back car seat. Of course I’m not offended. After all I was picked up almost immediately by my owner’s friend, who then speedily made arrangements to return my to my owner’s hands. In contrast, I believe that my owner felt the effects of neglecting me.

After all, I’m a responsible phone, committed to getting my job done.

The following is a non-exhaustive list of what I do on a daily basis :

1. I make sure my owner wakes up on time. She usually does but often heads back to sleep. That’s why I make sure that my snooze button is enabled

2. I help her stay connected with friends and family in another country

3. I help her stay connected with friends in the same country

4. I minimize her time spent waiting for the bus by telling her when the next buses are due to arrive

5. I give her immediate answers to questions she may be pondering about (yes, I’m wiser than I might look)

6. When she gets cravings, I point her in the right direction. I offer her choices; myriads upon myriads of recipes

7. Seriously guys, I’m the one who helps her feel, stay, be connected

Sometimes it’s easy to feel like I’m being taken for granted. However, when I remember my purpose in life, I’m motivated to continue to be the best phone I could ever be for my owner.

And that, my friends, is true devotion. May I live a long life and serve my owner well.

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